My whole life I’ve struggled with my weight. I’ve been overweight for almost my whole life. It’s been an area of insecurity for as long as I can remember. I’ve yo-yo dieted and lost and gained so many pounds over the years. I’ve always longed to overcome this area of my life. In so many ways I feel that I am successful, in my ministry, in motherhood, in personal growth, in my marriage, but I’ve never been able to tackle this.
One of the biggest mental struggles I’ve faced in my weight loss journey is the overwhelming feeling I get when I realize how much weight I have to lose. I would start on some kind of fitness plan and then buck out when I felt like I wasn’t making enough progress. I’ve always wanted to lose weight the healthy way, but I felt like doing it that way would take far too long to reach my goals. Because of this, it’s been too easy to quit and tell myself I’ll never get there.
More recently, I’ve realized that when my standard of success for my health journey are only the numbers on a scale, it keeps me in a vicious cycle of yo-yo diets and feeling defeated. I recently starting shifting my idea that my goals should be all output-based rather than input-based. For example, if my goal is to lose 20 lbs and I don’t see the pounds coming off fast enough, it feels like I’m a failure. But if I start to make my goals more about what I put IN (sticking to an eating plan, working out x amount of times per week, drinking x ounces of water, etc.), then even if the numbers don’t move quite as fast as I want, I won’t feel so easily defeated. At the end of the day, I can be proud of the steps I’m making in the right direction even if the scale doesn’t change. I can know that I met all my smaller goals, and that’s something to be proud of. Changing my perspective on my fitness goals really helps me adapt a healthy lifestyle rather than jumping on the most recent fad diet.
For so long I’ve put off making my health a priority. It always seemed like my attention should be focused on “more important” things, and if I had any leftover time or energy, then I would put that into my health. But you know as well as I do that there is hardly ever any leftover energy or time. I always felt like my ministry, kids, husband, house and whatever else had to come first before myself, but truthfully, if I’m not taking care of myself I can’t offer them the best version of me. I need to get my body well so that it can assist me in doing the jobs that God has called me to. Making my health a priority will also increase the longevity of my calling. I will be less likely to fulfill my calling in this life if I am sick in body at an early age. I want to be strong and healthy for a long as possible so that I can do God’s work on this earth for as long as I am able. No momentary pleasure is as satisfying as a life full of God’s work.
“Therefore, since we have been surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before Him He endured the cross, scorning its shame and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.” –Hebrews 12:1-2